Days come and go, the seasons turn and we have finally reached the first dark, turbulent days of Winter! Gazing out of my window across the drab khaki-green and brown fields, watching huge purple galleons of clouds majestically sail into view, I wonder what it is about this season which I love so much.
Perhaps it is that I finally get a few days to rest and catch my breath after all the hurly burly of the autumn, culminating in our three day celebration of Calan Gaeaf.
Monday (30th October) was the day we hold our Ancestor’s Dinner, when we gather around our dining table with extra places laid to welcome any shade of family past over who might be around at this special time of the year when the veils thin and loved ones are able to draw closer once more. A hearty meal of chicken pie in thick white savoury gravy accompanied by buttery red cabbage steamed with raisins and apples was followed by spicy Soul Cakes made to a traditional recipe, and numerous cups of freshly brewed Nicaraguan coffee from our local supplier. It is fair to say that I sensed the house to be happily bustling with movement and whispers and my son’s partner, who works from home, was wryly amused when a colleague on a video call asked who was singing in the background – she had been listening to the excited voices of children for some time, although no children have lived here this past thirty years.
The 31st October – Hallowe’en to many – was mainly fun and games for us, out in the darkness of our back garden where visiting children played the traditional games of ‘bobbing for apples’ and chasing the wildly swinging ‘sticky bun’ while we lit a fire and brought out steaming dishes of potato pie and fruit crumbles. Later, after the door had been answered to many excited ‘trick-or-treaters’, we settled around the welcome warmth of the blaze and told stories of the White (headless) Lady and Hwch Ddu Gwta, the tailless black sow who waits for unwary travellers by styles and crossroads (and other liminal places) and carries them off, possibly to be plunged into Ceridwen’s Cauldron… which might not be as bad as it sounds as it is a magical receptacle of rejuvenation and rebirth. More Soul Cakes were consumed as we sang the traditional ‘Souling Song’. Marshmallows were toasted and sparklers were lit as we all joyfully danced in the night with our brave little lights.
The third and final day was Wednesday, the 1st November. In the past, the old Celtic calendar, and many other cultures of the Northern Hemisphere, began their New Year at this time, with the ending of the harvest, the settling into winter and a break from agricultural activity. The shadows thickened as friends and family gathered around our cosy hearth, the candles were lit, and we shared the first afternoon tea of winter – a hearty affair of savoury pies, pastries and sandwiches, followed by crisp thick shortbreads delicately flavoured with lavender and lemon, sticky dark parkin, and other sweet goodies.
We discussed when each of us personally feels that winter begins and the effects it has on us. I understand that some dislike winter intensely and many suffer from S.A.D. as the Solstice darkness begins to close around us. Which leads me back to ponder why I, conversely, love it so wholeheartedly. Perhaps it is because I begin to anticipate all the joyful excitement and celebration of Advent, Midwinter and Christmas soon to come? Or maybe it is because I hold so many wonderful memories of special loving times around the hearth with my family, talking, making, reading, in our shadowy, candlelit kitchen which felt so very safe and secure. On the other hand, I did also chose this time of year to enter into this life, although that is often a traumatic time for both baby and mother and my advent was no exception.
Whatever the reason, the coming of Winter never ceases to thrill me with all its possibilities and potential for cosy times, the plotting of treats and happy events and the general making of magical surprises. As a fairy-godmother-in-training I delight in helping to make wishes and dreams – no matter how large or small – come true.
I sometimes think that the greatest gift I can give to anyone is to invite them to my hearth, enfold them in shadow and soft candleflame, ply them with lovingly-made edible treats and watch them relax, unfurl and awaken to the gentle magical delights of a Winter tea by the fire. Old memories stir within us at such times, and it isn’t simply the province of visiting ancestors – there is something incredibly fundamental about drawing together in shelter and safety around a brightly burning blaze and sharing good food and good company, while the wind howls and the rain lashes outside. It is the oldest communal activity in the history of the human race, and one which triggers memory held deep in our DNA, and a suitably favourable reaction.
Living fire, living flame might not be so common in our homes now, but you might at least consider lighting a candle in this new winter’s darkness and match it with a flame of loving anticipation and appreciation in your heart… you can also use a candle flame to toast marshmallows too!